Why cant Tottenham open up a restaurant?Because they have no silverware. Alex is a freelance writer and a lifelong Tottenham Hotspur fan, who has been writing about his beloved club through thick and thin since 1996. To see all content on The Sun, please use the Site Map. When post for another football club, London Hotspur, was mistakenly delivered to North London the club changed their name to Tottenham Hotspur. ", Meanwhile one simply stated: "Quality from the Arsenal website.". ", A third declared: "How embarrassing for Arsenal, that the official website has stooped to the banter levels of a twitter tween. Bit fucking ironic of Lord Sugar to be making fun of West Hams trophy cabinet. , to which God replied, In ten years. The disappointed admirer sulks away, exclaiming, Thats a shame; Ill probably be dead by then.The Arsenal fan and his walking cane push the first fan to the side as he sulks. He wants us to win the European Trophy, the dogs owner replies.The pub owner then asked what the dog says when Tottenham wins an away European match, to which the man replied, I dont know. What is the difference between Euro and Conte?Euro works in Europe. West Ham Place (@WestHamPlace) October 11, 2017. All my life I always heard the joke that Spurs never won a trophy so I assumed that was just fact. By rejecting non-essential cookies, Reddit may still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform. What is the difference between Bill Clinton and Spurs strikers?Clinton can score. Q: Which sexual position produces the ugliest children? How do you know Antonio Conte must have hurt his leg whilst at Tottenham Hotspur?He is always relying on Son and Kane. A: Last years winner of the hide and seek contest. 'JOKE': Injured Chelsea defender Thiago Silva becomes latest star to hit out at FIFA's Best awards as the 38-year-old appears to make dig at Julian Alvarez finishing above Kevin De Bruyne and . The stadium is the biggest club ground in London and is a marvel to behold. Thanks For Watching! I'll give you a lift!" The policeman said to himself I cant let his family see him like this, so before calling them, he took the Spurs shirt off. What do you call a Tottenham Hotspur supporter who scores high on IQ tests?A cheat. Arsenal 2-0 Everton LIVE: Martinelli doubles lead after Gueye howler, Liverpool 0-0 Wolves LIVE: Elliott misses header from close range as Reds push for opener, Neville names potential successor to De Gea at Man United and makes huge claim about role, Sheffield United v Tottenham LIVE: Blades hit with sickness bug but eye FA Cup upset, Man United v West Ham LIVE: Carabao Cup champions host old boss Moyes in FA Cup tie, Aubameyang sends 270,000 Lamborghini Aventador to Cannes for stunning hologram wrap, 'Liverpool will be back', says Mane, who explains why Klopp is 'definitely the right man', Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window), Click to share on Twitter (Opens in new window), Click to share on WhatsApp (Opens in new window), the opening of their brand spanking new megastore, potentially facing further delays until 2019, Completely cashless system which only accepts payments via bank cards or mobile pay, 100-seat auditorium area with a 36-screen video wall to host events, Video screens to show fans 3D visuals of potential shirt printings, PS4 consoles loaded with FIFA 19 to keep children entertained. 01/02. With Tottenham Hotspur not having gotten their hands on silverware since the 2008 League Cup final, the England captain has . Despite the goalscoring prowess of striker Harry Kane, who has won two Premier League Golden Boots, he has yet to lift a trophy with Tottenham. Suddenly, the driver saw a Tottenham supporter walking down the road, and he instinctively swerved as if to hit him. Q: What do you say to a Tottenham Hotspur supporter with a good looking bird on his arm? Enter your account data and we will send you a link to reset your password. Until just now when I was sitting down with my dad watching the league Cup final and I made a remark saying this could be Spurs first ever trophy. They have only lost once, in 1987, while winning the competition the other eight times they reached the final. What two Tottenham players make a Liverpool goalie?Alli-Son Becker. While Tottenham remain a solid team in the Premier League and even made a Champions League Final in 2019, they have little hardware to show for it. Keep up to date with all the latest Tottenham news and opinion by following SpursWebs Facebook, Twitter and Instagram accounts. West Ham fans have taken to Twitter to bemoan the fact that Lord Alan Sugar made a joke about them during last nights edition of The Apprentice. Q: How do you stop a Spurs supporter from beating his wife? Tottenham have their own customized version of the phrase to bottle. To Spurs a game or have something Spursed is equivalent to bottling something. 62/63. It reads: "Your basket is as empty as Tottenham's trophy cabinet.". A: Because you can park in the handicap zone! SW1882 Ltd - Suite 8 Homes House, 253 Cowbridge Road West, Cardiff, Wales, CF5 5TD
Tottenham are being brutally trolled online after releasing a season review DVD of the 2016/17 campaign - despite failing to win a single trophy - or even reach a cup final. Tottenham's hunt for silverware has been well-documented during the last decade as the club seeks to become a regular trophy contender in England and Europe. Spurs fans have been made to wait a while since their last trophy, but when was the last time that they enjoyed lifting a piece of silverware? While Spurshibernated as a mid-table side through most of the 90's, they broke through as a consistent top-half club in the early 2000's and began consistently challenging for European places, starting in 2010, with a fourth-placefinish. Q: Why are Tottenham strikers like grizzly bears? Spurs Trophies & Honours | Tottenham Hotspur Club Honours Club Honours Year By Year White Hart Lane Legends The 1901 FA Cup winning team Major Honours Football League Champions: 1950/1951, 1960/1961 The FA Cup Winners: 1900/1901, 1920/1921, 1960/1961, 1961/1962, 1966/1967, 1980/1981, 1981/1982, 1990/1991 Heres a selection of Tweets from the bitter West Ham fans. Have a better joke about Tottenham to mock your mates? A: So Tottenham supporters can get laid too. Though Mauricio Pochettino's Tottenham side was lauded as one of the strongest Premier League sides in recent years, they failed to win any silverware during the Argentine's five years at the club. Whats so special about Spurs from all other EPL clubs?They are a social experiment set up to see how far they can mentally and physically push a human being. After Spurs revealed that they were entering into another partnership, it did not take long for a supporters to start making suggestions about where paint cans could be stored. Since 1961:Man has walked on the moon.England has won a World Cup.The Berlin Wall was put up.The Berlin Wall was pulled down.Color television has been invented.Internet has been invented.Lots of people have Netflix and chilled.People have started paying in Cryptocurrency.But Spurs still havent won the league. Q: What is the shortest book in the world called? Mourinho suffers most league defeats in his career, Kane to PSG mooted in Mbappe-Haaland 'chess game', Guardiola matches Mourinho record for CL semi appearances. Gary Lineker has made a joke about Tottenham Hotspur on Twitter after hearing the news on Tottenham Hotspur Stadium. Three elderly football enthusiasts enter a church. Juande Ramos . Despite the fact the sides redeveloped White Hart Lane stadium is not yet opened, andpotentially facing further delays until 2019, the shop is open for business as of Tuesday October 23. "Certainly Sir" replies the receptionist, "have you donated before?". Why did Antonio Conte buy his team all lighters?Because they kept losing all their matches. One day while driving along, he saw a priest. Read ourTransfer News Live blogfor the very latest rumours, gossip and done deals, Arrogant ex-Leeds United player who raped girl, 17, jailed for 17 years, Tributes paid to World Cup legend Just Fontaine after death aged 89, Man Utd legend Roy Keane surprises Laura Woods live on ITV with comment, Man Utd takeover set to be DELAYED until May with Glazers intent on 6bn, News Group Newspapers Limited in England No. "That's no reason," she says loudly. A: A mosquito stops sucking. "Well, My Dad and Mom are Liverpool supporters, and I'm a Liverpool fan, too!" He then remembered the priest, and he turned to the priest and said, "sorry Father, I almost hit that Tottenham Hotspur supporter." A: Shoot the Tottenham Fan. What is Tottenhams new trophy room name?The Room. A policeman was driving along one day when he saw a car in a ditch.When he looked inside he saw a deceased man with a spurs shirt on, a dildo up his arse, a pink tutu on, and a lot of over-the-top make-up. You guys are awesome :) Open for links FACEBOOK: https://www.faceb. The Sporting News looks at the club's trophy record below. Most recently, Spurs fell to Manchester City in the . Whats the difference between Liz Truss and Tottenham Hotspur?Liz Truss has no sons. Theyre shit and we cant be bothered.Maradona looks at them and says Well I know Im a bit fat and old, but I reckon I can beat them by myself, you lads go down the pub. So Maradona goes out to play Spurs by himself and the rest of the West Ham team go off for a few beers.After a few pints, they wonder how the game is going, so they get the landlord to put the TV on. James Walker (@w88lks1980) October 11, 2017, @Lord_Sugar behave, no need for the #WestHam abuse #COYI, Joe Robinson (@RealJoeRobinson) October 11, 2017, @Lord_Sugar West Ham's trophy cabinet may be more sparse than your glamorous Spurs space. Understandably, Arsenal fans were quick to comment on the club's jibe as they revelled in the joke. 679215 Registered office: 1 London Bridge Street, London, SE1 9GF. Immediately the Jack Russell canine jumps up and shouts out, "Oh, no, not once more.". A: They both spend a lot of time in the cellar, cost too much and are only enjoyed on select occasions. Tottenham have been undergoing a phase of rebuild with Antonio Conte now at the helm of the club, tasked with bringing silverware and trophies to North London. They have come close but always seem to fall at the final step. There is, however, one exception. Q: What's the difference between onions and a Tottenham supporter? 66/67. Mohamed Salah's penaltyfor the Reds in the second minute, coupled with Divock Origi's 87th-minute goal, ensured that Tottenham would be forced to wait out their trophy drought for a little while longer. Opinion: Starter or super-sub; Where is Son most effective for Tottenham? The Ultimate Trivia Battle! But, as usual, he swerved back onto the road just in time. The Ultimate Trivia Battle! "Well, it says on your record that you're a useless wanker.", Q: What's the difference between Tottenham supporters and mosquitoes? 25 came in 2016-17 after winning the Europa League with Manchester United. . There's nothing worth craping on! "Yes" replies Emmanuel "you should have my details on your computer". Q: What do you call a dead Tottenham Fan in a closet? West Hams trophy room has got more in it, says @Lord_Sugar. Competitions are what give competitive football its structure. This service is provided on talkSPORT Ltd's Terms of Use in accordance with our Privacy Policy. Company number: 13367321, Spurs half time ratings vs Sheffield United Very little to be happy about, Report: Why Emerson Royal is not in the Spurs squad to face Sheffield United, Line Up: Sheffield United v Spurs Kane benched, Video: Spurs players arrive at stadium ahead of Sheffield United tie, Opinion: Analysis as Tottenham dominate Chelsea in a comfortable 2-0 win, Opinion: Spurs vs Chelsea: Three key areas where the game will be won or lost. What does an Arsenal fan do when he sees a blue bird flying?Shoots it and then gives it to a Spurs Fan. What do you call a dead Tottenham Fan in a closet?Last years winner of the hide and seek contest. Spurs have won silverware in the past, but it has been some time. Career Day The teacher is a little perturbed now, her face slightly red. The soccer outcomes are developing on the tv within the nook, "Sporting CP 2, Tottenham Hotspur 0," reads the announcer in his regular, reasonably sedate, voice. And Arsenal have poked fun at Antonio Conte's side by displaying a cheeky message on their official store. Even though he was certain that he had missed the guy, he still heard a loud THUD. To my surprised my dad corrected me saying they won the fa Cup and the league Cup before. English League Cup winner. The 2008 Carling Cup final was the first League Cup final to be played at the newly-built Wembley Stadium, with the previous finals held at Cardiff's Millennium Stadium. asks Emmanuel. Required fields are marked *. With Juande Ramos calling the shots back in 2008, Spurs beat Chelsea asJonathan Woodgate grabbed an extra-time winner to wrap up a 2-1 success, with Dimitar Berbatov's second-half penalty having cancelled out Didier Drogba's opener. 'My daddy is a dancer at a gay bar. Were totally in their heads rent free. What should you do? The. They then beat North London rivals Arsenalin the semifinals. Not really knowing what a Tottenham Hotspur supporter was, but wanting to be like their teacher, hands explode into the air. and our Famously, Tottenham also lost in the UEFA Champions League final to Liverpool in 2019, losing2-0 in the club's first foray that deep in the tournament's bracket. A: He turns off the PlayStation. A: Every fall they go into hibernation. 98/99. In the run-up to the final, Spurs topped Middlesbrough, Blackpool, and Manchester City all by 2-0 scorelines. Still, modern silverware has eluded them as the club continues to forage for a major title. Result from The London Stadium: West Ham 1 (Maradona 10 minutes) Tottenham Hotspur 1 (Kane 89 minutes). They cant believe it, he has single-handedly got a draw against Spurs!They rush back to the Stadium to congratulate him. Another saw Dulux asked if the firm's iconic Old English Sheepdog mascot could play at centre-back, with the response offered: "He might do a better job.". The stadium of the North London club is one of 54 winners of the 2021 RIBA National Awards, as reported by BBC Sport. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. Why are Tottenham jokes getting dumber by the day?Because the fans started to make them up themselves. Privacy Policy. What if Tottenham was a Game Thrones house?Their motto would be False hope is better than no hope.. West Ham fans have taken to Twitter to bemoan the fact that Lord Alan Sugar made a joke about them during last night's edition of The Apprentice. ", The jokes continued to flow. Here you'll find all collections you've created before. A: Because all the cups are in Manchester. The Englishman has joked that Spurs have now finally won a trophy. You wont get hit unless the bottles got your name on it., Thats just what Im worried about, said the fan,my names Johnny Walker.. "Oh yes, I've found your details" says the receptionist "but I see you're going to need help. It marked the fourth time that Tottenham were crowned League Cup winners. Of course, this wasn't the. The most recent trophy the club has won is the League Cup in 2008 (Carling Cup, later to be called Carabao Cup), beating Chelsea 2-1 in the final after extra time. For further details of our complaints policy and to make a complaint please click this link: thesun.co.uk/editorial-complaints/, Tottenham were trolled by Arsenal for their lack of trophies on the Gunners' online store, Independent Press Standards Organisation (IPSO). Spurs announced the opening of what they boasted was the largest club shop in Europe, which teed up these Gooners nicely to mock their bitter north London rivals. 40 FC Barcelona Jokes You Cannot Share With A Cule, 80 Football World Cup 2022 Jokes To Cheer Soccer Fans, 50 Funny Arsenal Jokes You Shouldnt Tell A Gunner. Spurs now need to get positive results on the pitch, win trophies and regularly play in the Champions League. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. Q: What do you call 5 Tottenham fans standing ear to ear? Why should Spurs have some talks with Theresa May?They got out of Europe within 2 months. A 2-1 comeback win over Rangers saw Spurs lift the trophy - but fans on. Q: Why do Tottenham fans suck at geometry? "Tottenham Hotspur's Trophy Cabinet. It was the moment that was supposed to herald a new era of success for the club under head coach Juande . On February 24, 2008, Tottenham lifted the League Cup to end their nine-year trophy drought. "The Sun", "Sun", "Sun Online" are registered trademarks or trade names of News Group Newspapers Limited. When is Tottenham going to win a trophy? For more information, please see our For Team which is top 6 I think it is far to say the lack of silverware is a concern when it happens year after year. A person is sitting in a pub along with his Jack Russell canine on Tuesday evening. However, as they have done for many years, Spurs bitter rivals Arsenal were quick to ask if this is an adequate replacement for a trophy the last piece of silverware Tottenham won was the 2008 League Cup, while their last league triumph came way back in 1961. Shall I call your wife for you?" Be it the home match against Leicester City in the season 2015/16 or the away match in Europa League R16 at Zagreb in season 2020/21, Spurs find a way to cheer their rival fans.In the current season, Tottenhams last-minute failure against Sporting Lisbon extended Antonio Contes dreadful champions league record. Up to $10 000 in daily prizes, Five reasons why Man Utd can win a quadruple , Pepe's best assist? They aren't being funded by some oil rich Sheikh, or some American billionaire. Martin Keown believes Sheffield United are coming up against a side who could well be this season's FA Cup winners. With it, theysecured UEFA Cup qualification for the next season something that they had failed to do through their Premier League campaignas they finished 11th in the table. Tottenham announced the opening of what they boasted was the largest club shop in Europe, which teed up these Gooners nicely to mock their bitter north London rivals Jump directly to the content A: The accused. A: Intelligent Tottenham supporters. The first is a Manchester United supporter, the second an Arsenal supporter, and the third a Spurs supporter. Why are Tottenham Hotspur fans so bad at geometry?Because they never have any points. The Lilywhites launched a Premier League title bid in 2015-16 and spent most of the season as frontrunners, but ultimately conceded the league to champions Leicester City. if (year<1900) {year+=1900} document.write(year); Trophy No. A: You paint Red Devils on his dick and he won't beat it for 4 years! Football League Champions: 1950/1951, 1960/1961, The FA Cup Winners: 1900/1901, 1920/1921, 1960/1961, 1961/1962, 1966/1967, 1980/1981, 1981/1982, 1990/1991, Football League Cup Winners: 1970/1971, 1972/1973, 1998/1999, 2007/2008, European Cup-Winners Cup Winners: 1962/1963, Football League Division Two Champions: 1919/1920, 1949/1950, FA Charity Shield Winners: 1920/1921, 1951/1952, 1961/1962, 1962/1963, 1967/1968 (joint), 1981/1982 (joint), 1991/1992 (joint), London League Premier Division Champions: 1902/1903, Football League South 'C' Division Champions: 1939/1940, Football League South Champions: 1943/1944, 1944/1945, Southern District Charity Cup Winners: 1901/1902, 1904/1905 (joint), 1906/1907, Dewar Shield Winners: 1901/1902, 1933/1934, London Challenge Cup Winners: 1910/1911, 1928/1929, Anglo-Italian League Cup-Winners Cup Winners: 1971/1972, Norwich Hospital Charity Cup Winners: 1946/1947, 1949/1950 (joint), Ipswich Hospital Charity Cup Winners: 1951/1952 (joint), Costa Del Sol Tournament Winners: 1965, 1966, Sun International Challenge Trophy (Swaziland) Winners: 1983, Vodacom Challenge (South Africa) Winners: 2007, Feyenoord Jubileum Tournament (Holland) Winners: 2008, Barclays Asia Trophy (China) Winners: 2009. Didier Drogba scored a free-kick inthe first halfto give Chelsea the lead going into the break, butDimitar Berbatov scored a penalty in the 70th minuteafter a Wayne Bridge penalty to even out the scoreline. English Supercup Winner. A booming voice welcomes them as they walk through the doors. FA Cup - 1901 (only non league club to win the trophy since the formation of the Football League), 1921, 1961 (D), 1962, 1967, 1981, 1982 1991 League Cup - 1971, 1973, 1999, 2008 Cup Winners Cup - 1963 (first British winners of a European trophy) UEFA Cup - 1972, 1984 More answers below Fred Rason It's career day in primary school where each student talks about what their dad does.